Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Four Loko... once and for all

So, I drink a lot of four loko and its dope. That's really all there is to it. I like gummy bears and I like alcohol that taste like malt liquor gummy bears. The whole crack down is comedy to me. I found this stuff earlier this year around March. I started seeing cans of it on the curb, mad people on the bus were drinking it, and the cans looked like sizzurp fucked an arizona iced tea. It was kinda crunk. I had one can and knew it was going to blow up.

Four Loko gets you crunk for $2.50 and most people only drink 1 or 2. Its making news because people are ending up in the hospital as a result of BINGE drinking four loko but tons of people murk themselves for binge consumption of other things like cheeseburgers, cigarettes, and scientology. What's worse? Four Loko or the Tea Party?

The fact that this is news is kind of ridiculous. Lawmakers need to find something besides four loko to stump about. There are tons of unlimited mimosa/screwdriver/bloody mary brunches in NYC but the SLA isn't "keeping an eye" on them. Continental has a 10 shots special for $10. Those specials are dope too. Keep it up. Alcohol doesn't kill people, stupid people kill people. Some of my homies are a bigger threat to society drinking coconut water than me with a four loko. Without four loko, people will just drink something else.

I fux with four loko cause its a wild-out concept and gets right to the point. It blatantly is created to get you blitzed really cheap and there is no pretension. It's an HONEST product. I love it. It's the moonlight bunny ranch of malt liquors. "Get in, get out, that's a OG's classic." This is the only time in my life I will ever quote Memphis Bleek, but sometimes mo-fuckers say some real shit.

Politicians just want to find an easy hot button issue that they don't need to actually read 300 page reports on to understand and can get the PTA/Soccer Mom vote for supporting. Ban alcohol targeted at kids, who wouldn't agree to that? You put the word "children" or "kids" in the headline concerning a political position and its taboo. No politician in their right mind would oppose a four loko ban. But, I'm not a politician, I don't have a constituency, and I think it makes no legal sense that this drink is being targeted.

On some Larry Flynt shit, I think a ban should be opposed. Banning four loko flies in the face of logical legal interpretation and the sole reason there is an argument to ban it is because what four loko promotes culturally (cheap booze) is an indefensible political position. Just like the prohibition of chronic in this country, there are so many things similar to four loko being permitted that it seems this is in danger of a ban because of the sub-culture surrounding it. Sometimes the law allows for cultural activities that conservatives oppose, but those activities don't limit or endanger anyone else's right to exercise their individual freedoms. So, logically, there is no legal reason why there should be a ban if we still believe in a social contract theory.

We're all kind of having fun with four loko from the music videos to house parties to cheap dates at Seward Park. We aint gonna hurt nobody with this shit... But look, two videos in one post... on my end, this is the last of the four loko talk for me. I got bigger fish to fry. My money says they find a way to ban it and some representative will get cheap votes. Bush league shit. Pun intended. And allowing this to happen is going to set a really shitty precedent that will affect an issue in the future that probably had nothing to do with four loko... This is the type of prophylactic bullshit that has made NY wack. Come through Thursday, we'll still be serving four loko at xiao ye but with a special that is in line with the SLA's laws. To my knowledge, we are still the only bar in NYC that serves four loko and we'll do it until we can't.

FYI: here is the facebook event for four loko thursdays http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=169412316419997 ... join the xiao ye group if you get a chance! @GeneralLoko on twitter... some fool stole @eddiehuang when I switched last week haha.


  1. My guess is that the "real" alcohol makers and distributors don't like four loko because it does give people a cheap drunk. And, because it might actually be kind of trendy (as opposed to, say, Mad Dog 20/20), it's a threat.

  2. You're right on the money, Eddie - Tea Party's FAR WORSE.

    Yeah, and you're also right that it's STOOPID people who binge and get themselves into trouble. Hell, like you said, there are plenty of other ways (breakfast mimosas) for people to get stupid.

    And a ban is jacked. No way. Even more stoopid.

    But, here's the big problem with Four Loko - a crazy number of teens and young adults are getting hammered to the point of hurting themselves AND OTHERS. I work in an ER here in the city... let me tell ya, for the last 4-6 months, the number of intoxicated teens in the ER has SKYROCKETED. Whatever, right? Kids do crazy shit all the time. Nawww, with Four Loko we've seen an absurd number of violent and avoidable traumas - we're talking a sickening spike in physical assaults under the influence of Four Loko, and a ridiculous number of young adults who've hurt themselves cause they just didn't realize how drunk they got themselves on it.

    I can't even begin to count the number of people I've had to suture up for lacerations, and put into splints for fractures - all courtesy of traumas involving Four Loko.

    I've been working in the ER for almost 10 years, and we've never seen a spike of alcohol related craziness like this with Four Loko. And let me tell ya, the consequences of all these high school teens (who stupidly think its safer cause its caffeinated) and college kids affects a lot more than just themselves.

    NO BAN.

    I'm with you on taking responsibility for ourselves. Period. But saying shit like, "Now I gotta figure out how to give people enough Four Loko so they can get their blackout. People like to black out" is just the kind of thing that stupid people take seriously. You may only be kidding, but on any given night - they'll just end up drinking crazy and doing something bad.

    And that's messed up.

  3. hey man... appreciate the feedback. I had no idea there was that big a spike in the ER. They should put you on the news! I for real am not trying to see anyone hurt themselves. Just having a good time. But, yea, I guess people just have no self control. Really appreciate you droppin a line... will affect my future actions re: four loko haha

  4. NO ban! Let 'em shoot it straight into the heart if that's what it takes to kill these idiots off. Too many of them in the world as it is.

  5. FreeFourLoko.com
    Support Four Loko and fight the ban.

  6. It's Gorilla Marketing player. If you can't handle the drink lay low drink bud light. Better yet don't drink....

  7. I totally agree!


  8. I think banning Four Loko on the grounds that alcohol and caffeine shouldn't be mixed is a stupid one. However if anyone tried to pass a law banning it because of what it is, a piece of stupid hipster trash culture, then I'd totally get behind that law. Sorry hipsters but this stuff tastes like Kool-aid mixed with acetone. If any of my friends admitted to actually liking this stuff I'd laugh in their face and never talk to them again. Have some respect for yourselves. PBR is a total crap beer that should be banned for the same reasons.

    Fucking hipsters.

  9. its real funny how anonymity got people sippin that haterade straight no chaser. real people speak their mind, without masks. #realtalk

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