Sunday, April 10, 2011

Men at Work: Weekend Edition

You might remember xtina from the Four Loko party...

She's baaaccckkk. Friday she was "up in the range man" and brought her home girls from Lewiston. It was a celebration. More about that next week....

So I woke up extra early at 3pm on Saturday, threw on that Johnson Baby Powder - Cool Water Cologne, and hit the Oyster jumpoff at New Amsterdam Market.

I was workin dumb hard on Saturday. Double time like Supreme Clientele. We ate all kinds of things.

Scooby snack jurassic plastic gas booby trap
Ten years workin for me, you wanna tap shit?
Bung bung bung! Your bell went rung rung rung!
Staple-Land's where the ambulance don't come

These oysters from the Middle were the best. Big, creamy (pause), slightly briney with a crisp finish. Like taking a hit from an ice catcher. #extracrispy

Bobo was there with Fried Oysters. Good. And April/Peter from John Dory shut it down with a pan roasted oyster chowder. Awesome. My bad, no photo. I'm sure some other blogger got it, but do you really want to read their half assed, quarter informed, 100% desperate attempt at escaping from a 9 to 5? "Who taught you how to cook fool?" - Pimp C

Before we left the oyster joint, we heard a lot of cornballs complaining that they were running out of food at the event. People made a run on oysters. I saw some people posted up in front of booths buying 8 to 10 of one type of oyster. Most of these people were aggy Asian women. This is why I prefer pink nipples. Sorry ma.

I don't know why people go to food events and act like they're at war. Take one and keep it movin'. Plus, although they ran out of some raw oysters, there was plenty of good cooked food, beer, and peeps. It was a CHARITY event. If you want a futuristic return on investment, buy stock in Baohaus, but if you trying to have fun and support a good cause, chill the fuck out.

After the oysters, we went up to Bar Boulud to see my man, my mellow, Michael Madrigale. Pittsburgh is always in the house. What up Damien! The Chef, Damien, is a fellow yinz-men and he is probably the best thing to come out of Pittsburgh since Steel and Dan Marino's yola connect. True story. We had mackarel with fried chickpeas, veal, cauliflower gratin, fries, charcuterie, and lots of champs.

Amy went clunker and left mad floaters...

But she ate all the macarons

Then we went to the Lincoln...

The kitchen was dope. The drinks were good. I heard the food is amaze-balls, but you sit in swivel chairs, there is no music, and Sarah Jessica Parker was there. Her show made me want to shoot my dick back in the day. I remember thinking in high school, "if that's what my girl is going to be like, i'm going to start dating gummy bears."

Just when I thought I couldn't eat anymore, I got home and found THIS from Vosges Chocolates. Get you some. If you haven't tried, DO IT. Yes, those are my chinatown fauxberry sheets. It smells like chocolate and soy sauce up in here.