Wednesday, October 26, 2011


Things on Eater usually don't bother me. I've been called a chink and they've taken it down even though I told them they should keep it up. Racism is every where and the only way to deal with it is to see it. I don't mind people who talk shit about me, Baohaus, Asians in general, etc. If we were to keep count, I spit more fire than anyone so it's part of the game. But, humor is only really good when there's truth to it... Tragedy is easy, comedy is hard. So, if yall are going to come correct, let's get a few things right.

It's blatantly unfair for people to expect individuals from a certain race to speak a certain way and any deviation from that speech pattern is an attempt at being something else. Language is 100% learned and conditioned behavior. The way you speak, if it's real, is a collection of your experiences, the people you've met along the way, the people those people met, and the things you've seen and heard. Without YOUR language, what do you have? The reason we don't have a National Language is because there are a few good men/women still out there who understand this is an immigrant country and language is at the root of it. You are fool to think that you are SUPPOSED to speak a certain way. Language is your opportunity to be yourself and represent the things you stand for. If you read military history or strategy, one of the first things conquerors do is convert the natives to their language. It's a disgusting, nasty, imperialist technique but it cuts right to the core and rips your native tongue out. When you tell people to "speak" like they're supposed to, that is what you're trying to do. Luckily, I'm not a basic bitch who succumbs to it.

When I write, I am cognizant of my word choice. Every thing is done with malicious intent, other wise I'd just be throwing darts and you best mother fuckin' believe, I'm shootin' every time I write. If you aren't cognizant of word choice, you're a fool and you should stop writing. I have gone so far as looked up the root and history of words and if I don't like what it comes from, I won't use it. If a certain word is something that has been "claimed" by a reference group I don't subscribe to, I don't use it. I'm fuckin' word certain.

I left the law because I didn't want to work in an industry I couldn't culturally identify with. It had every thing to do with social strata and corporate conditioning. White shoe firms break you down as individuals and make you a robot in their world using the words they've reserved for that industry. There are entire books on "Legal Writing" and how you're supposed to write. I refused to work in a place where there was no room for artistic expression, shit was just cold. Before you know it, you move the way they move and think like a hooker with a corner office. I met a lot of good people and there wasn't anything wrong with individuals, it was the rules of engagement in that business that I couldn't get down with.

The only reason I'm saying this and giving you any sort of insight is because it's blatantly unfair to people in general to suggest that there is a prescribed method of action because of skin. Anyone who made it to 10th grade got a lesson on nature v. nurture. I'm sure a lot of you can understand how tattoos or clothing are the things you show the world to identify yourself, but, nothing you do says more about you than the first time you open your mouth and say a word. From Pygmalion to My Fair Lady to the first time we heard Nas say "Straight out the fuckin' dungeons of rap..." we understood that the first google maps were your mother fucking words. Yiddish, Chingrish, Ebonics, Boricua, whatever it is you speak, sing that shit. The next time you come to me with this rotten banana/twinkie bullshit, put your computer on death and come to 238 e14th St so I can show you where the fuck I'm from.

Now, if you have nothing better to do than make fun of the kid, here are a few good ones

1) I have large aereolas

2) I love the McRib

3) I sing Justin Bieber at karaoke

4) I still want to fuck Lil' Kim

5) I'm a Knick fan

6) I thought Jin was going to go platinum

7) I think Cam'ron is one of the top 5 rappers of all time

8) When I sweat it smells like orange chicken

9) I once bought these boots and thought it was a good idea

10) I'm convinced there's a shawty out there for me who has pussy that tastes like red and green gummy bears... where you at?

Tuesday, October 25, 2011


The NCAA is weighing $2000 grants to help student athletes with the actual cost of attending college. I like it, but to me, it's still not enough. The athletes playing football and basketball bring so much revenue to top-50 schools, it's straight robbery that they don't share in it. But, schools are balking because its a significant investment since every single student athlete is being included in the proposal. You've seen those commercials they run during Saturday College Football games "I'm a Student Athlete" and it shows a bunch of random olympic sports no one pays attention to trying to convince us that all athletes are created equal. They're not. And if you disagree, please tell me how many Javelin throwing meets you've been to this year.

I understand that there are principles and ideals involved with college education and that you don't want to show students that some sports are valued more than others or some individuals are more important, but it's childish. In four years, when these people go into the real world, it will become very apparent that there is a social hierarchy when the only cross country running this athlete's going to do is down 10 floors to Starbucks and back. If under water basket weaving doesn't bring in TV revenue, well, they probably shouldn't get the $2000 grant.

Colleges are a business. Why is it that colleges want to pretend they aren't business when it comes to student athletes? It's business when they negotiate with faculty, it's business when they bring Chick-Fil-A into the school, and it's business when they ask alumni for cash. But, it's all about the moral high road when explaining why the school should reap the benefits of TV Revenue but the athletes should be happy they get a "priceless" education for free. Look assholes, this is propaganda. Education is NOT priceless. Any parent or kid on loans can tell you there is a VERY tangible price tag to school. And there is a very REAL collection agency that gets on your ass when you can't pay it. Stop fucking around and keep it real. Every one with a US News and World Report magazine knows how much each college costs. How is it that the media gobbles up this Hallmark Card defense about how education is priceless?

I don't even use most of my educations. Yea, my educations, cause I got more than two of them joints. "Boise State president Robert Kustra urged supporters of the plan to look at the support that Division I student athletes receive, and compare it to 'the rest of our students, who are making minimum wage, collecting tips, trying to find their way into their next semester at the university ... Go back and examine the life of a student athlete in intercollegiate sports in America today, and see how privileged they are to be where they are and the opportunities they have.'"

Yo Kustra, I'm going to use my legal education for a hot second and make a few distinctions for you:

1) Your bus-boy student makes money collecting tips for HIMSELF. No one is broadcasting his 8 hour shift at Shoney's refilling ketchup bottles just like no one broadcasted me stealing sweet potato casserole at Boston Market. You get no revenue from people buying Denny's jerseys cause no one fucking wants a Denny's jersey with some kid's name on it from Creative Writing 101.

2) Your student athletes ARE directly making money for your school through ticket, jersey, memoribilia, tv, radio, and ad sales amongst a myriad of other things. They are also indirectly making money for your school by raising attendance because no one fucking heard of Boise State besides Matthew Barney before you cracked the top-25 a few years back.

3) I went back and examined the life of a student athlete at Boise State and I'm pleased to announce that it is an entirely unprivileged position and their are no opportunities. What the fuck are they going to do after they stop playing football? Pick potatoes? If you google the words: "Boise Job Market" the second hit is a link to the discussion "BOISE JOB MARKET DEAD?"

So yea, Kustra, eat a bowl of blue pubes.

Lastly, if none of my appeals to logic strike a nerve. Just watch the video of De'Sean Butler at the top blowing out his knee for his University. He got paid ZERO for that game and saw his future go down the tubes. Don't tell me that he "got an education" dude should have gone to the NBA when he was 19 and got paid.