Monday, November 1, 2010

Offer You Can't Refuse

Look. When shawties need inspirations, they watch Clueless. When chinkstronauts need advice, we watch the Godfather. All three parts. Consecutively. And then try not to laugh hysterically when Sophia Coppola gets blasted and tries to be dramatic. Please bitch... Your acting is worse than my steamed cabbage. Fucking Coppola... Fucking Sifton (still luv u... no homillz)... Fucking cabbage... I liked the cabbage but it was pretty unanimous that I was out of my mind.

That reminds me, Mean Girls/Clueless is on special at itunes. Rick Ross says: Wasting Money Fast.

So, after watching the Godfather, talking to staff, reading yelp reviews (yea, we needed the roor for that), and listening to recent customers, we came to some conclusions.

1) People liked - minced pork on rice, beef noodle soup, potstickers, hainan chicken, general tso's head on prawns, bean paste noodles, loco moco, fried pork chop, cheeto chicken, new short ribs, tofu bricks, and my mom. Note: Mom dukes is in the house all week. Eatocracy (CNN) will be in the joint Thursday.

2) They didn't like: cabbage, the old beef ribs (which got changed), overly sweet cocktails, grilled corn (cause got overcooked at times), snow pea shoots were inconsistent, and the prices.

3) The primary complaint was that we kept changing the menu and that on return visits certain things weren't available. Additionally, parties of 2 felt it was difficult to taste more than 3 items without dropping $30+.

This is what we're doing.

We are going to increase portion sizes AND have individual portions for things like potstickers, head on prawns, bean paste noodles, minced pork on rice, etc. We're adopting the old Chinatown "on rice" and "small plate" price structure. It's an offer you can't refuse. Same quality, same la frieda meat, all the shenanigans out the door. We'll have a lot of specials, but the core of the menu will be consistent. And honestly, at the end of the day, what's so wrong with getting a beer and 8 duroc pork potstickers for $12? Or a bowl of beef noodle soup and beer for $11 on your way home from work? Its very simple yall. Little Taipei above Houston. No tomfoolery. Yea, tomfoolery, that's an SAT word I just dropped on u and this aint even my first language. Touchdown. Here is the new menu.

Lastly, this crazy Pastry Chef, LaToya Jenkins, who moonlights as a valtrax dealer for my boy woody sent me a photo of her funfetti cake.

I wouldn't eat this shit again while Wearing Sunglasses at Night on Ramadan. Yes, Lil B, you need a song named "Wearing Sunglasses at Night on Ramadan".

Killa Cam came to brunch for Halloween.

Killa: Baby girl, keep ya hands off my minks

Girl: Damn, that's the realest since kumbaya

Killa: Go get ya wet wipes


  1. "yea, we needed the roor for that" lmao

  2. Eddie,
    If Prop 19 is passed tonight, will you please think about opening up in Cali? You can bring your ROOR & your Volcano to LA & open up right next to a weed dispensary.

    Now that these dudes: are now selling $4 boba milk teas from a truck, I think we're *THIS* close to jumping the shark.

  3. haha... i was already telling people, if prop 19 passes, we're coming FO SHO. and i hate LA... but baos and headband are kinda the ultimate combo meal.

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